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New Breakthrough in Mathematics Discovered at the University of Tennessee!
by haymarket 
by Lumpy Sheepbert
of the Dilly Dally Tymes staff
02 Feb 2010
Researchers at the University of Tennessee and Oak Ridge National Laboratories, have made an amazing new discovery in Mathematics. In his final State of the State Address in Nashville, last night, Governor Phil Bredesen announced the exciting new breakthrough discovered by Scientists at UT & ORNL.
By applying the formulas these entrepreneurs have designed, the University of Tennessee will be able to create 200 brand new tenured track full-tyme Faculty positions, by cutting their budget by over 6%! These new Faculty positions will remain on ORNL Federal soil, yet be funded by State monies!
When asked for comment, Governor Bredesen said, “Well, at least I ran as a Democrat.”
02/02/10 12:01:14 pm, 
2 comments
And in order to calm the fears of folks on Campus, Dr. Simek gives us a video designed to make Pavlov's dog wet himself and jump off a cliff. Please watch the following video in a safe place, for this author takes no responsibility for the dangers associated with trying to decipher the context.
http://160.36.161.128/UTK/Viewer/?peid=cf7ae405724d46d19c1bddec6406b154
http://160.36.161.128/UTK/Viewer/?peid=cf7ae405724d46d19c1bddec6406b154
02/02/10 @ 14:35
Comment from: hypocrites [Visitor]
Hay,
What you sayin here? Surely your donkey isn't palling around with an oil man.
What you sayin here? Surely your donkey isn't palling around with an oil man.
02/05/10 @ 00:37